Day 223

Well today was 10 times worse then last night! I cannot get over this depressed feeling. I have felt this way for 2 weeks now, but at first I could control it just by making myself busy or by talking to someone now I cannot stop it or make it better. I just cry over everything and anything or even nothing. I cried because I had to call the doctor and he was not in, I cried because I went to wal-mart and looked at food and knew I was going to have to eat but just don't feel like it.I cried when I rememberd I forgot my chapstick at home and my lips hurt!  I cried when I got to work because the girl working before me asked how I was. then when my boss asked if I was ok I cried even more. I have not cried since 3:30 but I am depressed and feel like I could at any second. Keith brought me to work today so he could have the car. Ethan is going to his grandmas house for the night and Keith MIGHT go see a movie he wants to see that I don't. Then after that he is going to come to work and bring me dinner and sit with me for a little bit. I asked him to come get me early so he can sit with me the last half hour I have of work (if he even leaves me once he comes) I don't care what my co-workers think or even my boss. Until they are in my shoes and feel like I do I don't want to hear it. The most that can happen is I would get fired but my boss now knows I am having problems with depression as well as 4 co-workers. So I am not worried about it. I need him here to help me through this.
I am calling the doctor Monday to see if there is anything he can do for me. I cannot deal with this much longer.
For now I am trying not to look at the time so I don't know how much longer I have to be here at work! because if I think about it I will cry!
I brought House with me so I think I am going to watch that or read my book to pass time. I so cannot wait until Keith comes!
Well Keith came around 11:30 we ate dinner together then we watched The Karte (spelled wrong) kid and then he left at 3:00 he is going to come pick me up at 6:50-6:55 then I think I might have him run through and get use breakfast because I am so hungry.
I had a good conversation with an old friend. We had a falling out a few years ago and we just started to talk a little a few months ago and last night we talked for a few hours talked about what happened and a few other things. It was so nice to be able to pick back up like we just talked yesterday. After I set up what I could for breakfast I laid down and slept until 5:30 then got up did the rest and now I am on Facebook getting ready to get off and pack my stuff up.

The Pork Chop Keith made for me!